In person, I’m generally considered decently cute by the outside world. Or at least, I pretend that I’m cute and people usually believe it.
But now for the slight ongoing problem:
I’m entirely un-photogenic.
You may argue, “Dionna, That’s not true! I’ve seen good pictures of you so many times!” But here’s the thing: I have to make a very concentrated effort to look good in pictures. Does it work sometimes? Yes. But is it a struggle? So very much.
You know how much I enjoy compiling random lists, so today I compile a list of problems cute-but-un-photogenic people have.
1. You can’t flirt on Snapchat.
Haha!! If a boy ever asks me for a cute picture, have no doubt that I’ll be sending him one of my plush neuron, cause it’s much cuter than I’ll ever look according to a front-facing camera. And hey, nobody’s loss there. But purposefully ugly snapchat faces? I’m a total pro at those. Believe me.
2. It’s impossible to figure out how other people really see you.
Are you actually the glamorous fairy you saw in the mirror this morning? Or do you more typically resemble the rotting zucchini version of yourself that appears in pictures? Life is full of mysteries. You’ll never know.
3. You’re always that friend who makes the photographer retake the picture a million times.
Understandably, because you know you have SO MUCH POTENTIAL to look good. You’re beauty is just struggling so hard to be captured.
4. You’re mind-boggled by your perpetually photogenic friends.
Actually though, HOW DO THOSE PEOPLE DO IT? Their ways are forever a mystery to me.
5. You inevitably take the utmost pride in cute pictures of yourself.
On the rare occasion that you’re caught at the perfect angle that really captures your essence, you make sure that EVERYBODY knows it. New profile pic. New Instagram. Heck, you might as well throw it back and print out a hard copy.
My dear fellow cute-but-un-photogenic people: In the end, let us continue to carry ourselves as the beautiful people we are, take pride in the complements we’re given, delete those ugly photo tags of us with a vengeance, take pride in the ugly faces we can make, and keep on slaying.
OK SO I’M REALLY EXCITED BECAUSE I REALLY LIKE THESE COOKIES. SO MUCH. Have you ever heard me be so enthusiastic about a non-chocolate recipe? Exactly. That’s how good these cookies are. Chewy perfect on the inside and crunchy on the outside and caramel-y and nutty and toasty and just perfect. And eeassyy. I made magic.
Almond Caramel Cookies
Makes 20 cookies
1 cup creamy almond butter
1/2 cup coconut sugar
1/4 cup maple syrup
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/4 teaspoon salt
Almond slivers for topping (about 1/4 cup)
Caramel drizzle: (technically optional… but seriously come on.)
1/3 cup coconut sugar
1/4 cup full fat coconut milk
- Preheat oven to 350deg F.
- Combine all Cookie Dough ingredients in a large bowl and mix until a sticky dough forms. Dough should begin to form a sticky ball and disattach slightly from bowl.
- Roll dough (easiest with damp hands) into 1.5 in balls and lay onto parchment-lined baking sheet, about 2in apart.
- Press almond slivers into top of dough balls.
- Bake for 17 minutes and let cool (will harden as they cool)
- Place Caramel ingredients into a medium saucepan and mix thoroughly on medium heat.
- Allow mixture to come to a boil, then lower to low heat and stir.
- Allow caramel to simmer for about 5 minutes, stirring occasionally to prevent burning.
- While the caramel is still warm (can be re-heated any time) drizzle onto cookies.
- Allow caramel to cool and harden.
- ENJOY OMG.